352. Goodbye 2010

2 years ago, about this time in the middle of Times Square in New York I stood amidst 100,000 (probably more) people. While I had some of the best times I have ever had and crave for it every time the New Year dawns, this was the day I found out that in this world, you need to find your solid ground because amidst all these people, when the clock stoke 12 - I was in reality alone.

I remembered clearly what I wanted, and what I expected, what I got and what I didn't.

This day in 2008 I learnt to love myself before others. I grew up.

Last year in 2009 I told myself to live with less expectations. Less expectations in others, but more expectations in myself. I told myself to drive myself further, push myself harder and be ultimately, independent.

And in 2010 I did just that. (Or at least, tried)

In 2010, I learnt that I am one stubborn cookie. I remembered times when I hit my rock bottom, but as saying goes, when you hit rock bottoms, you need to gather courage to stand up, for if we look at it, there is no way else but up. Life was designed to bring us down only to show how strong we really are.

In 2010 I learn that my biggest fear, is failing myself.
I learnt that I am determined to the point that if I were to wake up one day and have nothing to strive for, then I have failed myself.

In 2011, I am going to enter it knowing what I want, and how to get it. I know this is as cliche as it gets, but I am ready for whatever life is going to throw at me in 2011, for I know now,

No matter what happens, for everyday I wake up, I know I have a the greatest gift of all. Life.

351. Christmas List Part 2.

Are you ready for Part 2 of my Christmas wish list?

1. A Dior eye shadow pallet in Purple-ish colours. Dior makes THE BEST eye shadow.

(Fine I am a bit biased and have not tried many brands, but its true)

I think this pallet number 970

2. A Set of brushes from The Body Shop AND a make up bag.

I am tired of using my hands and getting everything glittery. And I am tired of putting my make up in a lunch box.

3. A really good piece of steak. 

No, I am not talking a good piece off a men. I got mine already albeit he isn't that meaty.

Medium rare. 

Its so hard to find amazingly cooked meat at the restaurants these days. :P

4. A good classic board game.

And I meant classic only because I don't like explaining the rules every time we want to play.

Something like Risk or Monopoly would be great. :D

I never have anything to entertain my guest with here in Bodung. Could be nice if I had some board games.

Okay got to go to work now, I have Part 3! Promise I'll be done after part 3,4,5,6,7,8, ....., 39849237402794 

Hee..

350. Christmas wish list.

So, this are stuff I wish (probably need to buy myself) list. Some superficial, some I actually really need but cannot come to terms with parting with my hard earned money. Fml.

On no order of preference what-so-ever.

1. A new camera! SLR, not SLR, Digital, Polaroid, at this point whatever. Something so I can click and stare at gorgeous pictures.  Have decided to buy this myself with my Christmas money. 

2. A camera bag to put my camera in. If am going spend all my money on the camera itself, where am I to find money for a bag too? So Santa, I would like a nice bag for my camera please, A Crumpler 7 million dollar home in Red would be nice as I definitely do not want a ugly regular looking camera bag.

3. Hunter Boots in Navy Blue colour. Which Magnar sort of said he would get it for me, but even if he doesn't I would definitely go get it myself when I head to Scotland. So Santa, you don't have to get me this. :D

4. A new running shoe. A Nike Free would be lovely. You have no idea how ugly mine is since I use it all the bludeh time. I live in my working out shoes I am desperately in need of a new one

5. YSL Arty Oval ring. This ring is simply uh.mah.zing. 

6. A new agenda/wallet preferably from Mulberry or Miu Miu. Actually Santa, what I really want is a new bag, but since they cost way too much money. I can settle with smaller things I use daily. And as of right now, nothing is more important than a good organizer. :)

7. A new knitted sweater, in beige or camel.

Santa I freeze often because I simply do not have any warm clothes. :P

Santa, I need to go now, but I will come back with Part 2.

349. Never look down on people.

Never.

I learn that after actually having worked a whole bunch this year. Never look down on people no matter who, how or what they are doing. Because behind all of it, you really don't deserve to judge, unless you know whats behind the facade.

Since I have worked I learn to appreciate so much more. I got a comment today that make it sound like being a waitress is such a bad thing. Supposedly it is something so bad, such a "non trivial job" (and this I quote), so low class and what nots.

You know, someones got to do it.

Let it be clear I have never been a waitress before in my life, but I have am/was once a cashier person at a grocery store. I guess that was one of the lowest "low class" jobs I have ever had. But that low class job I had paid me more money than any other jobs I have ever had (as a social worker, babysitter, etc). It allowed me to be completely debt free and allowed me to not rely on a student loan or any sorts of loan for that matter. 

It showed me that I am obviously not like you (Oh, I know you will read this). 

I at the very least work for my God damn money.

I am so sorry that my parents didn't leave me a million dollar at my disposal. Crap right, damn my parents. Damn they too have to work. So sad so sad.

(Interval so we can all cry about how sad my life is) *Cry cry cry*

I know of people who waits and have homes 5 story's high. Its called learning the value of a dollar. 

Oh and  I think the one best lesson from working a "low class" job is it really drives you. It drives you to do better. It shows you what you are capable and drives you there.  It shows you that sometimes you need to climb the ladder (with enough determination). You don't just end up on the top. You need to get there.

Lastly,

It teaches you how to appreciate people.

Do you think someone would do those "non-trivial" job if they had a choice? No. 

But they do it. How do you know they dont have a family to feed at home?

And who are you to tell criticize them for that?

PS: Guess where you can find me working these days? Forex Bank at Lillestrøm Jernbanestajon! Yay!

Once cashier lady now moving up! :) Or is that still "low class job"?

And because I know that you would be reading this. I still think this ideas the Malaysian government has is ... well... ridiculous. 

http://news.malaysia.msn.com/regional/article.aspx?cp-documentid=4405354

And before you come with silly little remarks. I am not talking about drug dealing or not judging a rapist or anything of that nature. So, please. Dont pretend to be stupid. 

347. This is just effing bizarre!

I got this off Rohini's Facebook, but its just too good I just had to share.

It just made my day. I haven't laughed so hard, and got so confused all at the same time in a really long time.

Just watch. BIZARRE.

And looks like they have a whole series of it! Fuck. I am so going to get hooked.

Seriously. What. The. Fuck.

346. A quick update

So I see there are still actually a few people that visit my blog daily though my updates has been very scarce. 

Its about 1.16 am now as I am typing this. I just finished reading a chapter of my Python Programming homework so I understand a little bit more in class next week. And now I am going to go watch some Mtv's True Life and maybe browse the Kenzo show from Paris Fashion Week for some eye candy! 

I haven't been up to much lately, besides the usual but today Magnar and I took a quick trip to Oslo for the sake of it and I must admit that I throughly enjoyed myself. 

First we went over to the Kunstindustri museum (Art Industry? Museum)

Which in my honest opinion was far from being anywhere near my idea of a good museum, there was a bit to see but nothing to really write home about.

The fun-est thing we did there was playing at the children section, colouring patterns. Yeah, we never really grow up really.

Then we went over for some vegetarian food at Vega (which happens to be the same place I have been before with a different name) Completely recommended. Might write a review on it if I go there again!

Then we headed to Pascals for some macaroons, then some Geo-caching then we heading to Lillestrøm, had sushi and watched James Bond.

So yeah. That was my 10.10.10.

Hope your day was great too! 

345. Music Plug

Now I really really really like this girl. If there is one person I want to win X factor, it would be her!

Gamu Nhengu singing Adele, Make You Feel My Love

Which in case you didn't already know, Make You Feel My love is actually my special song! 

The only sad thing is that the "bookies" over in the UK supposedly don't think she would make it.
Hrmpf.

344. Plans

I have had some time to think lately, and since I feel like a lot of things in life are going in my favour I can afford (literally and not so literally) to start thinking of what the future holds.

Sometimes I think the future terrifies me in more ways than I can imagine. But its enthralling to think of what tomorrow might bring, who will stick with me, and who I have to leave behind in the quest for my own selfish happiness. In order for us to find happiness in others, we need to find our own happiness.

I wish I could share what I have planned, but I can't (and I do as of right now hope that I will carry them through) I don't need you or anyone else to tell me what I should or should not be doing.

343. Music Plug

Eliza Doolittle, Pack Up

342. The quest.

I was telling Magnar's dad how I've never really had the chance to live the "single life" and would like to date another 100 people. So he said, at the rate I am going, I need to get through my men faster.(*Not exact quote, but the point remains) Haha!

So I thought how hard can it be to find 100 men?

Let me tell you. Hard.

Come do some math with me!

Lets do some math. Since I don't actually have very many friends I have to turn to Facebook to carry out my imaginary experiment.

So as of today, I have 240 Facebook friends and 60 pending friend request. (And since I need the numbers, I'll use the 60 pending) 

1.First due to personal preference sexual preference I need to eliminate well, woman/girls. 

(300/2=150)

2.Right,then you need to find men who is "dateable" material. Lets say, we take half the men as "all-right"  (150/2=75)

3.Then you have to lower it down taking away men who well, have same gender preference as me. And well, I have lots of gay men friends, and they are super <3 but unfortunately... 

So, lets say I have 

(65-10=55)

4.Then we have to lower down to men who are already taken. I might be on a quest, but I am not well... needy and horny. :P 

(55/2= plus minus 23)

5. Then I need to make sure that these men I am trying to find is within a day of travel range. I dont want to waste my days traveling if I want to keep my 100 men goal. :P

(23-20=3) 

6. Then I need to find a men who is willing to entertain me, give me cuddles, take me out, answer my calls any day or time, a person you can talk about anything and everything, you know all that mushy stuff. etc etc

(3-1=2)

7. Now comes the tricky bit, we of course need to have the men to want you so, that eliminates even more people 

(2-1=1)

8. And to top it all off, since I believe we should all have standards and thus I need to want every one of that "100 men" myself too. I can never imagine dating men unless I actually like them. And plus, I don't want to be some weird slut solely on a quest. 

So yeah, after all that calculation we have narrowed my options, I am left with one dude.

Crap. 

I think as of right now, you were meant for me!

And there probably isn't any other better person for me either.

And above all, there probably isn't any person I really want more than you.

Its sometimes hard to see it in the midst of a mood tantrum and when you don't learn to answer my calls, or entertain me all the time, but all that goes over and it will be okay again.

So, you should really just let me embark on my adventures for something tells me I'll always come back to you.